Saturday, September 3, 2011

The Reason I Will Probably NOT Be Losing Weight This Week

You ever have a week where you eat perfectly, and drink EXACTLY the right amount of water, and exercise, and you can't WAIT to get on the scale because you KNOW you're gonna have a loss?

Well, my friends...this was NOT that week.

You know how some people are all: I eat small portions, and I never eat junk food...I have no IDEA why I'm fat!!?

I'm not that girl.


I know EXACTLY why I'm fat. I love to eat. Even now. I love it. Better than sleeping, better than sex (I know...you didn't expect THAT, right??) I think about food (this week, specifically, WINGS!!) and I plan for it, and often I feel ripped off because I know that real estate is limited now, so I can't eat as much as my clearly-descended-from-starving-people brain tells me I need to eat. And so, obviously, there is inner turmoil.


Sometimes, "Virtuous Gilly" wins! And other times, "Evil Fatty Gilly" sees a sign that says Deep Fried Mars Bars, and it's all over. That happened this week.


Damn you, carny food!

This is my cautionary tale: don't go to the place where they deep fry EVERYTHING (have you ever had deep fried butter? Me either, but I considered it! I also considered the deep fried Oreo, a deep fried Twinkie, and deep fried COLA. Yes I did!) with money in your pockets (or a fatty mother who has money in hers)! It is bad bad bad!!! For your ass, I mean. The mouth part of me was pretty stinkin' happy for a while there...
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19 comments:

  1. ♥ Drazil ♥September 3, 2011 at 11:33 AM

    What is that first picture? I seriously want to eat the flipping screen. It looks to die for.

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  2. SamanthaSeptember 3, 2011 at 12:05 PM

    This "I know EXACTLY why I'm fat. I love to eat. Even now. I love it. Better than sleeping, better than sex (I know...you didn't expect THAT, right??) I think about food (this week, specifically, WINGS!!) and I plan for it, and often I feel ripped off because I know that real estate is limited now, so I can't eat as much as my clearly-descended-from-starving-people brain tells me I need to eat"

    This is me. My mom seems to think i have some deep psychological issues to work out.. but no. Food is nummy. I like food. the end. :) and damn your pictures!

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  3. JustineSeptember 3, 2011 at 3:18 PM

    I like food too. And darn this band thing for getting in the way of that! Was the top picture one of those giant battered onions?
    And what did you think of deep-fried Mars bar? I had one once in Edinburgh (they deep fry anything/everything in Scottish chip shops, including pizza and Creme Eggs); I wasn't that keen on it, but I think it might have been because it was fried in the same oil as the fish...

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  4. DiZneDiVaSeptember 3, 2011 at 6:26 PM

    I look fried food and sugar... So Deep Fried Candy Bars or cookies, or twinkies are the devil to me... LOL Hello? Funnel Cake, anyone?

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  5. SherrySeptember 3, 2011 at 9:18 PM

    All of that food is evil... And you know how I LOVE evil.

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  6. CCSeptember 3, 2011 at 10:08 PM

    yeah what is that first pic? and the deep fried mars bar looks like a deep fried turd...just saying

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  7. Flabby McGeeSeptember 4, 2011 at 10:45 AM

    I hear ya. I just like food. End of story. I feel like Fat Bastard from Austin Powers - "Get in meh belly!"

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  8. JustawallflowerSeptember 4, 2011 at 5:34 PM

    Oh my goodness, I have seen the deep fried butter, and I always think my eyes are playing tricks on me. What does that taste like? And who eats that?

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  9. CamilleSeptember 4, 2011 at 7:43 PM

    What the Hell??

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  10. kageadSeptember 4, 2011 at 10:18 PM

    That first thing has me so intrigued that I keep coming back to look at it. Like a bad car wreck. Or the Kardashians.

    Hell, I say if you are going to be bad, be BAD. Not like me who eats 10,000 lbs of grapes and is paying a very dear price for it. Grapes. I'm such and idiot. I could have had deep fried numminess but I had grapes.

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  11. Melissa WSeptember 5, 2011 at 12:18 AM

    Hey, thanks for posting all those pictures and making me HUNGRY!! They remind me of our Wisconsin State Fair which was the weekend before I got banded. I just HAD to have my cheese on a stick! I think most of us are fat because we love food!! You're not alone on that one!! :)

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  12. SandySeptember 5, 2011 at 8:40 AM

    That is sick. Just sick. Damn Americans for thinking of such a destructive food item.

    (Ok, it looks amazing and the way you describe it, orgasmic). Damn Americans. They need to think up something more enticing like deep-fried salad...

    And for any Americans reading this, I really don't damn you in any shape or form. We just know how creative you all are with food and wish we could be just like you.

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  13. ReadSeptember 5, 2011 at 5:55 PM

    eh... it happens. But seriously.... deep fried butter??? what the hell???

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  14. RhondaSeptember 7, 2011 at 9:25 AM

    Yuuuum.

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  15. KGSeptember 7, 2011 at 9:50 AM

    I loved how absolutely honest your post is - it made me laugh and it sounds like you were inside my head! I think the same things you wrote about most of the time :-) I'm fairly new on my journey, but I just love reading peoples struggles so I know what to expect for myself.

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  16. Catherine55September 7, 2011 at 10:25 AM

    Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa???! That is deep fried insanity!! I love your "I know EXACTLY why I'm fat" comment. For years I lied to myself about that, blaming my metabolism... instead of my 9 or 10 p.m. carb fest... and my actual calorie intake... Your honesty is more refreshing than deep fried Coke, to be sure!

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  17. AnonymousSeptember 7, 2011 at 1:13 PM

    OMG that deep fried mars bar looks devine..... that is why I avoid carneys.
    I am a new follower- BOOBS sent me
    http://robynnest-robyn.blogspot.com/

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  18. DawnyaSeptember 7, 2011 at 3:50 PM

    Damn, damn, damn. I would have devoured that mars bar in 10 seconds flat. BTW...deep fried twinkies are the nectar of the gods I tell ya...just darn right nummmy!!!

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  19. KristinSeptember 13, 2011 at 9:51 PM

    My sister went to the Iowa State Fair this year, wearing a t-shirt that said, "I went to the Iowa State Fair and all I got was Type II diabetes."

    We totally will have to make a date to meet there one summer. ;)

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