Today I had a fill. I wasn't scheduled to have on until May 13th, but I called on Friday because I just it was going to be dangerous to wait that long. Thankfully, they are awesome there and were able to fit me in first thing this morning!
So I'm sitting there in the waiting room beside a plump lady...just quietly messaging Angie and waiting my turn...when the plump lady starts talking to me! Now don't get me wrong...I am totally a talks-to-strangers kind of a gal - my son is forever asking me "mummy...do we KNOW that person??" - but for some reason, when I'm sitting in the waiting room THERE, I don't want to chat with ya! Weird, right? However, she asked me if I'd had the surgery (ugh...see...right there is a good reason I don't want to chat, because obviously I HAVE because of the total skinniness of my ass! Bitch!) and then she proceeded to tell me that she had HER surgery in September but then went to Florida for the winter, and so she hasn't lost any weight yet, blah blah.
Now, don't get me wrong...she was nice enough, and I did chat to her, but inside I was thinking "dude...NOTHING?? You went through all this and you've lost NOTHING???" and I was inwardly freaking out because these are the stories I do NOT want to hear! I do not want to know that it's even possible to fail. I don't want to even suspect it! And now I can't stop thinking about this very cordial fat lady who is failing! Yes, I know she's not me...and I know that I have like a bazillion people on here who show me every single day how success is totally possible! So why is this one woman sticking in my head??
I totally need to stop talking to strangers. Next fill, I am bringing earphones and sitting there with them in my ears!
I know, that little sliver of doubt can be so much more powerful than a little sliver of hope. I hate when that happens to me. Anyway...I know you can and will do this, so will I!
ReplyDeleteIt takes effort to lose nothing, right? Well, in the first few months at least.
ReplyDeleteI have a funny story about the man who started a conversation with me in the waiting room. I suppose I should blog about it. Stay tuned.
I would have said soemthing to the extent of "And your point is...?" Then I would probably say something pretty damn snarky about how I was progressing nicely. But then again I am a bitch and I'd be wondering why she was telling me the negatives WHEN I should be saying soemthing supportive along the lines of "Well, hopefully the doctor can get you back on track and determine what the cause of your issues are."
ReplyDeleteYou are doing awesome and there are tons of us who are proof that it works AS LONG AS we work WITH IT!!
Gilly - I was worried about not succeeding, but then I had a realization. What I've come to figure out is that everybody in this blogger community creates a positive energy that overcomes any individual issue we might face. Have you ever noticed when someone complains about being on a plateau or having another challenge, within a few posts, after many supportive comments from fellow bloggers, the problem gets resolved? It's actually kind of scary. I know it's a combination of writing about it, which we all know is therapeutic, being accountable and the support from everyone here. I think this is perfect example of "the whole is more than the sum of it's parts." Don't worry you're pretty little head about that woman. Next time, tell her to blog. XOXO
ReplyDeleteThat's why I love this blog community. And why I don't go to my support groups here. I want to surround myself with people who are succeeding! I get it that we all have bad days (or weeks), but on the whole, this is a group of women dedicated to success. We can do this... with the band... and with each other's support...
ReplyDeletenext time you can call me instead of messaging!
ReplyDeletei think when i go in there now they stare at my boobs and wonder if I've had them done! haha jks. (fyi to everyone else there's a plastic surgery center and our clinic in one building together!)
I would DIE if I hadn't lost - but I think that's why the band success rate is lower - most of us rock it but a few people can't commit to the changes, fills, etc.
Wow that is crazy! Nothing! I got my surgery in Sept. and am up to 50 down - I try, but not nearly as hard as some! It would be hard not to lose at the right restriction IMHO.
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile it is always fat dudes in my office. Why? Dunno. I often chat because I am in such a good mood about getting a fill finally!
That's funny! I'm totally the opposite. I hate talking to strangers...i'm just not that chatty. But funny enough i dont mind talking to strangers about the band....i get excited about it despite my current issues i still get excited.
ReplyDeleteBut those I DO sometimes like to avoid are the ones who have not lost because what do you say exactly...i'm sorry...maybe you should follow the rules?
We're fill sisters-Just got back from a measly 0.25 cc's added. See I'm a gradual filler upper. But I feel a bit of restriction. I HATE people who talk to me and I usually say something crass like what Stephanie said but I'd actually tell them-something like "sucks to be you-I'm a superstar!" or "sucks you wasted all that money-next time buy a car!"
ReplyDeleteAnyway, clean her out of your head. There are some who can't use this tool. They drink their food. When you hit that sweet spot you will so rock this world. I hope we both get there this week. I had a blissful food laden weekend, chowing down on anything and everything including an entire bag of chocolate chips (it was the 300 gm size at least). There will be bumps in the road. Just hope we are all driving bull-dozers.
Can't wait to see you on the 21st. Will send you an e-mail a few days before so we can figure out time and place.
Hello! Just found your blog, and I have to agree with the other posters about how awesome this community of band bloggers is! I wish I had found something like this when I first got my band 3 years ago. Anyway, I thought I was going to be one of those failures, but the nice thing about the band is it's never too late to put it to work!
ReplyDeleteI feel exactly the same way. I don't even want to consider that some people fail with the band. It just doesn't seem possible. What is so ironic is that I'm begging to get in for a fill and that woman clearly could care less. Why can't I have YOUR doctor and she can have mine??? Urgh.
ReplyDeleteIt sticks in your head because we fear it. But let me say this. I highly doubt that she was following the rules. We are all not perfect bandsters obviously but ya gotta follow them a little! We all cheat and have off weeks, but nothing?? Come on. Plus you've got belly dancing on your side!!
ReplyDeleteI forgot to say "CHEATER!!!" Haven't you now gotten two fills since the challenge started? My surgeon only allows one every 6 weeks. Grrrrrrr.
ReplyDeleteThose stories of no/low weight loss always stick in my head, too. I think it's the amount of work and effort that one has to go through to even get banded that makes me feel like it just _has_ to work. If it doesn't then what was the whole point behind all that crap one has to go through? And so on and so on...
ReplyDeleteThink the music and headphones will help next time-LOL!
yeah...there is a lady in my support group who has not lost a thing in her whole second year (she has at least 100 more to go)...every time she talks i want to plug my ears and scream...i know, real supportive of me.
ReplyDeletein my surgeon's waiting room they play the stupid lap band infomercial on constant loop. and half way through a lady says that with restriction and exercise she lost 20 pounds a month. makes me want to cry over my measley 10 pounds a month.
Quit being so damn cute and people would stop talking to you. Geez. It could be worse - people could start dry humping your leg - that's what Amy W would do.
ReplyDeleteEven though I consider myself pretty successful at this point I still worry about backsliding and gaining it back sometimes. I agree with everyone else that this community breeds successful bandsters. We will succeed!
ReplyDeleteShake it off and put that negative bitch out of your mind.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing great on your program and with all of these people who love you...your band in fail proof.
Yep...I am so a talk to you kind of person too...I sense we have that in common...but don't talk to me about failure with the band!!! P off please....and how is the fact that she can't see how small your ass is???? You won't fail...we won't let you
ReplyDelete